Apr. 25, 2004 @ 12:18 p.m.

Opening my somewhat tattered, tainted, and stained memory box full of shiny orbs that remind me of tears that are about to fall out of perfection to a waste of splattered oblivion as if they were destined to explode on impact for a reason. Each one has a carefully chosen place among the plush velvet seating arrangements. My memory’s seating director needs to be congratulated on a job well done. The newest orb, placed among older ones with similar value, reminded me of something I had forgotten about her. How she taught me things. How she was there when no one else was. How she opened herself to me when I could see that I was just about the only one standing in that venue. While I had hoped for more I didn’t realize that more was already had and that it would take me over half a year to realize that she gave me a gift so filled with love that I could never comprehend until I reached the point of being able to give such a gift myself. Once my girlfriend now turned to feeling like my little sister, to always be watched over and cared for. I hurt for her to leave. I feel like a Godfather watching from the comfort of the dark corner, sitting in an old chair as your smile shown while you picked which photos to talk about to your little group of friends, not even realizing why. I blend in so I can remember, so I can watch. I say nothing because I don’t want to effect the perfection of such a moment. Watching the friendship you have with your closest of friends and realizing that I’m such a lucky person to have been let into that field of comfort. I just wanted to thank you and this is how I go about doing such things. Your life is taking a new turn and you’re going to find out who you. It’s a damn fine, beautiful thing. For now my tears fall and shatter especially for you. I hope that your life is everything you want it to be and that when as it reveals itself you’ll keep me in mind to share it with. You were the first girl I met in Denver and I can honestly say that if I can only know you for the rest of my life, I owe someone a huge debt. Congratulations Emily, you rock. <3